I've been finding it hard to sit in front of the computer, to concentrate and focus on the things I need to get done, fortunately everyone has been pretty understanding so far, and slowly I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's hard when you work so hard and feel totally under-appreciated. I'm not someone who can put half in, I put all or nothing, and since I can't put my all in anymore, I had to switch to nothing for awhile.
My only solace (or consolation, or last kick in the ass) is that my old job will be replaced by someone who will be paid at very least more than me, to maybe even 33% more. And I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that they won't be able to replace me, at least not in that price bracket. I've really got to learn to quit before it gets too late, I guess my loyalty and dedication can be both an asset and a critical flaw.
So now, I try and focus on life again, getting things in order, and going out to kick some ass. I know I can do it, I just got to get my feet under me. Fortunately I have a wife who is not only loving even though she can't always understand the stupid things I do, she will stick by me no matter what, even when I'm a horrible PITA. And that extends to a family who is always behind me, supporting us, and not saying I told you so when I didn't move on earlier.
All in all I think it'll be positive, I just need to get my focus and concentration back, and soon I'll be on top, ever better than before.
-E
